WICKED GARDEN - WHO WE ARE
Wicked Garden is a swinger personals web site that was started in 2007 by like minded couples who felt that they could create a web site with great features, sexy members, & great customer service. The creators of Wicked Garden realized that swingers have lot's of choices when it comes to swinger/lifestyle websites. For that reason, Wicked Garden always strives to be the best in everything we do. If you are a swinger, and want a great lifestyle experience, join Wicked Garden today for FREE and find out what it's all about!
WICKED GARDEN SWINGER INFORMATION
What is swinging?
Swinging is when a couple in a loving, committed relationship choose to have recreational sex with someone other than their partner, most commonly another couple. The most common form of swinging is probably for two couples to swap partners and engage in sexual activity all together in the same room. Swinging is not cheating as everything is done openly and with the full knowledge and consent of both partners.
Who are swingers?
Swingers are mostly couples, either married or in a committed long-term relationship, and can be all ages, races, and from all walks of life. Single males and females who attend swingers events and have sex with couples can also be referred to as swingers.
Why do people become swingers?
People become swingers for many reasons. Couples who are happy in the lifestyle generally become swingers to add something extra to their relationship. Swinging when brought into a troubled relationship does not work and will only tear that relationship apart. Swinging is not an answer for a troubled relationship. Swinging will not solve the problems in your relationship. People also swing for social contact, to make new friends, and because they love sex! A very common way to enter the lifestyle is when the female half of the couple is bisexual and the couple begins by searching for women, either singles or couples, for her to play with. Many couples begin as soft swap and may progress to full swap later as their comfort level changes.
What is the difference between soft and full swap?
In soft swap, no one has sexual intercourse with anyone other than their own partner. Soft swap activities can range from voyeurism, where a couple watches another couple have intercourse, to touching, kissing, and oral between couples. Bisexual play between the two women is also a common form of soft-swap, although not all women in the lifestyle are bisexual. Different soft swap couples prefer different activities, so communication between couples is key! Full swap couples may do all of the things soft swap couples do, and also may engage in intercourse with people other than their own partner.
What are the different types of swinger parties we can go to?
There are basically four kinds of swinger parties: a house party, a party at a swinger club, a swinger party at a non-swinger (vanilla) club, and a hotel party. We’ll start with house parties.
House parties are by invitation only, so they might not be the best way to get started in the lifestyle since it can be hard to get an invitation when you don’t know many people yet. Sometimes if you see an ad up on the website for a house party you can email the host and they will invite you, but many times they will only ask those they have already met. If you are invited to a house party be sure and read the invitation to see if you are required to bring anything; many parties are BYOB. Although you can generally wear whatever you would like to a house party, no matter how risqué, most couples prefer you to be discreet and dress normally until you are inside. So it may be best to take that negligee in a bag and change once you arrive. Also, be sure and think about sleeping/driving arrangements ahead of time. Some people have room for everyone to stay overnight who needs to and some do not. If the invitation is extended to stay overnight it is polite to let your hosts know if you plan on doing so! Otherwise, general common sense rules apply, just as anytime you are a guest in someone’s home: be polite, respect the host’s property, respect others at the party, etc. The big benefit to house parties is that they are a smaller, more intimate setting where many couples are already acquainted and comfortable with each other.
Swingers clubs are open only to swingers. Most require you to purchase a membership before attending; this is to ensure that everyone at the club is in fact a swinger and is not just there to stare. Many clubs are not open to single males, and for those that are you will usually pay more as a single male than as a couple. Other than that the rules vary widely by club and it is best to familiarize yourself with the club before attending; many clubs have websites. Generally clubs contain tables, a dance floor, a bar or a place to store the alcohol you brought, and bedrooms or other facilities for sexual activity. If a club is off-premise that means there are no bedrooms and you must go elsewhere to have sex. Some clubs serve alcohol and some are BYOB; some allow hard liquor and some are beer and wine only. Also the dress code will differ from club to club! You may be required to “dress-to-impress” to get in the door. Once inside, however, most clubs will allow you to wear as little as you want; nudity is almost always permitted (and in a few cases required!) So I know what you’re really wondering:
What goes on in a swingers club? What will I see? What can I do? Well the short answer is, pretty much anything! Now the lifestyle is not a free-for-all. The same social rules for meeting people at any party generally apply. Be polite, respectful; introduce yourself, ASK BEFORE YOU TOUCH, etc. Having said that, at many private swinger clubs it is permissible to be partially or totally naked anywhere in the club, and to engage in whatever kind of sexual activity you would like wherever you would like. Of course, the rules differ from club to club, and most people do use the bedrooms, but you should still expect to see a lot of nudity and some sexual activity.
Swinger parties in “vanilla” clubs
Often swinger web sites or organizations will host parties in a regular old bar or club that you might go to any day of the week. Most often the club or a private section of the club will be closed off for the party to prevent unwanted attention. These parties are usually open to anyone, don’t always require a membership, and are a great way to meet people when you are just getting started. The downsides are that sexual activity will almost certainly not be permitted on premises; also there will be a dress code to follow and no nudity or partial nudity allowed. So behavior here is much more restricted than it would be at a swingers club or house party; however these parties are relatively cheap and a great way to meet a lot of new people.
Hotel Parties take place in the social areas (usually a bar or night club) within a hotel. The swinger’s organization running the party will try and rent out as many rooms as possible (sometimes the entire hotel, sometimes an entire floor) to ensure privacy for the swingers. Generally, no lewd behaviors are allowed in the social areas within the hotel. Any after party activities take place within the privacy of your hotel room.
Well what about just meeting people from online one-on-one? Is that safe? What should we expect?
The best plan is always to verify that someone is real first! Check to see if they have been verified on the site, then it is a good bet they are real (although we cannot 100% guarantee, couples break up, things happen). You can also confirm by a web cam meeting or a phone call first. Of course you should always be careful with your phone number though! This is just a suggestion, but you can always get a pre-paid phone for $20 and use that number for people you don’t know. Also you can block your number when making phone calls! If you can’t confirm that a couple is real, use more caution when deciding to meet. If it is a single guy pretending to be a couple, you will more than likely just be stood up, and it’s certainly best to meet in a public place like a restaurant or bar for the sake of safety.
Even if you have confirmed the couple is real, it’s still best to meet first in a public place. Not only is it safer, it’s less awkward than going to someone’s home when you don’t know them. After all, if you like someone, you can always go back to their house later once you know them better! Another great way to meet hot couples you’ve been chatting with online is to agree to meet at a swinger’s party. After all, that way you’re guaranteed to have a good time!
Are there any rules that Swingers have to follow?
There are some general rules you should expect to follow wherever you are, whether at a club or someone’s house. If you are at a club or any event sponsored by a group (where you were required to sign in) be sure and check at the door to see any additional rules they may have.
- No means no – always true, everywhere! You should never be made to feel pressured or uncomfortable by anyone.
- Never assume and always ask – Always ask before you touch! This goes under “treating people with respect”. Yes, she may be attracted to you and want you to touch her, but how do you know unless you ask first?
- Be polite and treat others with respect – this goes without saying!
- Excessive drinking is frowned upon – A lot of people tend to drink a little too much their fist time out of nerves. While this is understandable, all it does is ruin your evening! No one will be attracted to you if you are stumbling all over everywhere. And if you are really nervous, being drunk just makes you more likely to be really upset. Just watch how much you drink, and have a good time! If it is a BYOB party then don’t bring more than you really need.
- Jealousy - Everyone will experience a little jealousy at some point, it’s perfectly natural. What is important is how you handle it – take your partner to the side and explain to them, calmly, what made you upset and why. Your partner should respect your wishes at all times, as you respect theirs. Causing a scene or getting upset with the other couple (assuming they had no way to know their actions would upset you) is considered very rude.
- Dress code – varies from club to club, also many clubs have “theme night” parties where you can dress up, so be sure and check what to wear before you go. As a general rule, though, men should dress classy and women sexy (not trashy, though, unless that’s the theme of the party).
- Drugs are prohibited – Illegal drug use will get you kicked out of any club.
We’re just starting out, do you have any advice?
The first thing is to talk. Talk to your partner about absolutely everything; communication is key. If there’s anything you have questions about, are uncomfortable with, or don’t want to do, the time to bring it up is now. You don’t want to wait until you are actually in a situation to try and decide if something is okay or not. Once you are ready, take some time setting up your profile! There are a lot of profiles on the site, and you want yours to stand out, so be original! Be sure and post some pictures, a lot of people will not contact you if you haven’t put any pictures up. Pictures are a good way for people to see you are who you say you are, especially if there are pictures of the two of you together. It is important to have pictures of both of you! Men, we understand that some of you feel no one wants to look at you, and you are better off with just pictures of your hot wife. Keep in mind, though, that if there are no pictures of the male half of the couple, many other couples will assume it is because you are just indescribably ugly and won’t waste their time with you. Even a clothed body shot with no face is way better than nothing. Don’t just wait for e-mails, either – check out the site, check out the profiles, and if you are interested in someone let them know. Send some emails out yourself. Be sure to write more than a few sentences. A lot of people send basic emails such as “We like your profile, check us out and drop us a line if you are interested.” While there’s nothing wrong with this, it’s very generic and will not get you noticed. And be sure to reply to any emails you receive, even if it’s just to say you’re not interested. This is just the polite thing to do.
And finally, check out some parties or a club! This is the fastest way to meet people and get involved in the lifestyle. If you are intimidated by going to a party where you don’t know anyone, this is where you can really use the website. Look up the party in the forums, find out who else is going and e-mail some of the couples you are attracted to. Talk to them a little bit, agree to meet in person at the party, and there you are! You know people now!